Miss Peregrine’s Home for Peculiar Children Movie Review¬†

When his beloved grandfather leaves Jake clues to a mystery that spans different worlds and times, he finds a magical place known as Miss Peregrine’s School for Peculiar Children. But the mystery and danger deepen as he gets to know the residents and learns about their special powers – and their terrifying enemies. Ultimately, Jake discovers that only his own special peculiarity can save his new friends. Based on the novel “Miss Peregrine’s Home For Peculiar Children,” written by Ransom Riggs.
I did not like this movie but that might be because I read the book before watching it. Still, I believe that even if I hadn’t read the book I still wouldn’t have liked the movie.
Way too many details have been altered and condensed in order to make the story slightly more palatable.
I don’t want to sound like a book snob but the book is definitely better.
On a scale of 1 tamale to 10 tamales I give Miss Peregrine’s Home for Peculiar Children 6 tamales! ūüėé

I Love You, Beth Cooper Movie Review 

A nerdy valedictorian proclaims his love for the hottest and most popular girl in school – Beth Cooper – during his graduation speech. Much to his surprise, Beth shows up at his door that very night and decides to show him the best night of his life.
This is definitely one of my favorite teen comedies. Sure, the story isn’t very unique and none of the actors give grade A performances but it’s still a decent movie to watch when you want to take a break from heavy dramas and just laugh your ass off.
Paul Rust is pretty hilarious as Denis Cooverman and Hayden Panettierre is quite fetching as Beth Cooper.
If you like decent teen comedies then I recommend watching I Love You, Beth Cooper.
On a scale of 1 tamale to 10 tamales I give it 8 delicious tamales! ūüėé

Predestination Movie Review 

Predestination is unlike most time travel movies. Well, it is and it isn’t.
John (Ethan Hawke) is a temporal agent working for an extremely top secret bureau that uses time travel to prevent horrible crimes from happening. The movie begins with John’s last failed attempt at catching a criminal known as the Fizzle Bomber. He prevents a bomb from exploding but gets his face scorched in the process.
Once back at the bureau, his face is reconstructed but doesn’t look quite the same. He still wants to go after the Fizzle Bomber but is told that he must retire and find a suitable replacement. (Temporal agents can only time travel a limited number of times before it starts to affect their physical and mental health.)
So, he travels to 1970s New York City and takes a job as a bartender at a crummy bar. A few weeks later, he strikes up a conversation with a young patron who also happens to be a writer of some notoriety. He eventually proves to be a suitable replacement, John then discloses everything he needs to know about being a temporal agent.
I wish I could go into more detail about the rest of the plot but doing so would really spoil the entire movie. However, I will say that this movie deals with an often ignored aspect of time travel that will really make you think.
If you like scifi movies that make you think I highly recommend it! Even if you don’t like scifi movies that make you think… I still recommend it! I believe everyone should watch Predestination at least once in their lifetime.
On a scale of 1 tamale to 10 tamales I give it 9 delicious tamales! ūüėé

Anomalisa Movie Review 

‚ÄčAnomalisa is a very unique movie. It’s definitely not for everyone but that’s part of its charm.
Michael Stone (David Thewlis) is an inspirational speaker and author who has found himself in a rut. His job is unfulfilling and everyone he meets looks and talks the same. Then one evening, while in Cincinnati for a speaking engagement, he meets a lively woman named Lisa (Jennifer Jason Leigh) who helps reinvigorate his passion for life.
After spending one night with Lisa, Michael is ready to leave his wife and start a new life with her. Unfortunately, his euphoria quickly wears off and he’s forced to deal with the reality of the situation.
The entire movie was made via stopmotion animation. So, there’s a very surreal quality throughout but make no mistake… it’s not a kids’ movie. There’s lots of cursing and adult situations. This includes a true to life sex scene. Yes… a sex scene involving two stopmotion animated characters.
I will admit that it took me a few minutes to adjust to the stopmotion style but once I did it felt like I was just watching a really well written romantic comedy with dashes of fantasy.
If you like movies that are unique but still portray the human condition in a very realistic way then I highly recommend watching Anomalisa!
On a scale of 1 tamale to 10 tamales I give it 9 spicy tamales! ūüėé

Equals Movie Review 

‚ÄčIn an emotionless utopia, two people fall in love when they regain their feelings from a mysterious disease, causing tensions between them and their society.
I was pleasantly surprised by this movie. It’s not your typical utopian/dystopian movie. Well… it is and it isn’t.
Nia (Kristen Stewart) and Silas (Nicholas Hoult) are illustrators living in a utopian society sometime in the distant future. At first glance everything seems peaceful and perfect; a veritable paradise. But every paradise has its price. 
After a worldwide apocalypse reduced almost everything to rubble and killed billions of people a small group of survivors figured out how to manipulate and change human DNA in order to ensure the survival of future generations. Of course, the quickest way to accomplish this was by getting rid of mankind’s ability to feel any emotion. 
Yes, this inevitably created an entire race of non-thinking, non-feeling beings who were easy to control and therefore easy to use for the construction of a new civilization. 
All was going according to plan until long repressed human emotions began resurfacing causing people like Nia and Silas to gravitate towards each other and experience deep feelings, like love, for the first time. 
Both Kristen Stewart and Nicholas Hoult give riveting performances. The cinematography is also pretty unique.
This movie might not appeal to everyone but I do believe it offers some meaningful insight into the human condition.
On a scale of 1 tamale to 10 tamales I give Equals 8 tamales! ūüėé

Horns Movie Review 

‚ÄčIn the aftermath of his girlfriend’s mysterious death, a young man awakens to find strange horns sprouting from his temples.
Horns is a pretty bizarre, weird, crazy, wacked out movie! And that’s what makes it so awesome!
Ig Perrish (Daniel Radcliffe) is wrongly accused of murdering his girlfriend. Just about everyone in his hometown treats him like an infectious monster. Then, as if things couldn’t get anymore complicated, two devil-like horns begin to grow out of his forehead.
The story is very well written! Though, it’s not surprising since it was adapted from a novel of the same title. Daniel Radcliffe also gives a pretty great performance. He’s definitely come a long way since his Harry Potter days.
If you like weird and awesomely unique movies then I highly recommend watching Horns!
On a scale of 1 tamale to 10 I give it 9 tamales! ūüėé

Crimson Peak Movie Review 

‚ÄčAfter marrying the charming and seductive Sir Thomas Sharpe, young Edith (Mia Wasikowska) finds herself swept away to his remote gothic mansion in the English hills. Also living there is Lady Lucille, Thomas’ alluring sister and protector of her family’s dark secrets. Able to communicate with the dead, Edith tries to decipher the mystery behind the ghostly visions that haunt her new home. As she comes closer to the truth, Edith may learn that true monsters are made of flesh and blood.
This movie surprised me. I thought it was going to be yet another mediocre horror movie but there’s actually more to the story.
Yes, there are plenty of ghoulish scenes but they are actually quite important to the development of the main character, Edith. Mia Wasikowska definitely gives a strong performance throughout the movie. As does the entire cast.
The cinematography also adds a lot of texture and color to each scene. It gives the movie a very gothic yet industrial look.
There are also some shocking plot twists that really round out the story nicely.
If you’re interested in watching a horror movie with some depth to it than I highly recommend watching Crimson Peak.
On a scale of 1 tamale to 10 tamales I give it 8 tamales! ūüėé

A Bigger Splash Movie Review 

‚ÄčWhile vacationing on a Sicilian island with her boyfriend (Matthias Schoenaerts), a rock star (Tilda Swinton) receives an unexpected visit from an old flame (Ralph Fiennes) and his seductive daughter (Dakota Johnson).
I had never heard of this movie before renting it but I’m glad I took a chance on it. Though, it might be a little too artsy for some people… it’s still worth watching at least once.
The entire story revolves around the familiar yet uncomfortable relationship between four people. Rock music is also a central theme but the only rock music played throughout the movie is that of The Rolling Stones.
Tilda Swinton plays Marianne Lane, a well known but fictitious rockstar who cannot speak due to a recent vocalcord surgery. She isn’t very believable as a rockstar but still gives a strong performance.
For me, the best performance comes from Dakota Johnson as Penelope Lannier. I mean, forget her in Fifty Shades of Grey. Her role in this movie is definitely worthy of praise and admiration.
I will admit that the first half of the movie is slow going but once it reaches the half hour mark the story takes an unexpected turn. I refuse to reveal exactly what happens. That would only spoil it.
If you like artsy movies with a rock theme and a little bit of mystery then I recommend watching A Bigger Splash.
On a scale of 1 tamale to 10 tamales I give it 8.5 tamales! ūüėé

Suicide Squad Movie Review 

‚ÄčSuicide Squad is a good first attempt at a movie that stars and focuses on comic book villains. It is not total crap like some reviewers have claimed.
I really didn’t have high expectations before watching it. Though, I do consider myself a pretty big DC Comics fan and I was already familiar with the basic story of the Suicide Squad. More than anything else I was interested in seeing a live action version of this group of bad guys on the big screen.
The Squad consists of more than one psychopath but none of them are crazier than Harley Quinn (Margot Robbie). She really takes the cake, scratch that, she destroys the cake and laughs her ass off while doing it! Margot Robbie gives an awesomely accurate performance as Harley Quinn! There’s really no other way to describe it.
Will Smith gives an okay performance as Deadshot. Still, I can’t help but think that he shouldn’t have turned down a chance to be in Independence Day Resurgence. 
Jared Leto’s portrayal of the Joker is… different. And by different I don’t mean better or worse than Heath Ledger’s mindblowing Joker. Leto definitely brings something new to the role but I can’t quite say if I liked it or not. Though, he did make sure to keep some of the Joker’s mannerisms. Such as his iconic laugh and narcissistic personality. I would probably have to watch the movie a couple more times in order to really absorb Leto’s Joker. If you’re expecting him to remain true to the classic Joker we’re all used to… you will be disappointed.
Other notable characters include El Diablo, a guy who can create and manipulate fire, Killer Croc, a human/crocodile mutation, Captain Boomerang, a long time enemy of the Flash, and Enchantress, a super powerful witch. Enchantress is actually the super villain that the Squad is forced to confront. (That scene alone is quite intriguing.)
Overall, the story is decent but to me it just seems like a cool side story that got stretched out in order to fit a two hour running time. Still, it’s a very well made movie and I’m definitely looking forward to the sequel and many more sequels after that.
On a scale of 1 tamale to 10 tamales I give Suicide Squad 8 tamales! ūüėé

Nerve Movie Review 

‚ÄčNerve is about an online dare game, in which people give participants anonymous dares for money. The participants compete with each other to win the grand prize as the dares get tougher. Things get worse when the tasks get increasingly dangerous and lives are at stake.
I didn’t know what to expect from Nerve. I mean, I knew it was based on a novel but the only thing I knew about the novel was that it has a lot of mixed reviews. Still, I enjoyed this movie a little more than I thought I would.
I suppose one could compare it to similar movies such as The Hunger Games but in truth… it’s more like a postmodern Roman gladiator games with a lot of social media influence.
Emma Roberts and Dave Franco give fairly decent performances as Vee and Ian, the game’s newest popular couple. Their dares start out pretty simple but eventually become much more risky and lethal. I won’t give away too many details but there are some very interesting twists and turns. I was also really surprised by the ending.
If you like suspenseful movies that highlight the pitfalls of social media then you might enjoy watching Nerve.
On a scale of 1 tamale to 10 tamales I give it 8 tasty tamales! ūüėé