The Veil Movie Review 

Thirty years after a charismatic cult leader convinced his followers to kill themselves, a survivor returns to the scene of the horror with a documentary crew.
I somewhat expected this to be a stereotypical horror movie but the story is actually quite intriguing. Yes, much of the acting falls flat and most of the action sequences are extremely cheesy but it does raise a lot of deep spiritual/philosophical questions.
I won’t comment much on Jessica Alba’s performance. She… did an okay job.
If you like movies about cults you might enjoy this but don’t expect anything groundbreaking.
On a scale of 1 tamale to 10 tamales I give The Veil 5 tamales! ūüėé

Miss Peregrine’s Home for Peculiar Children Movie Review¬†

When his beloved grandfather leaves Jake clues to a mystery that spans different worlds and times, he finds a magical place known as Miss Peregrine’s School for Peculiar Children. But the mystery and danger deepen as he gets to know the residents and learns about their special powers – and their terrifying enemies. Ultimately, Jake discovers that only his own special peculiarity can save his new friends. Based on the novel “Miss Peregrine’s Home For Peculiar Children,” written by Ransom Riggs.
I did not like this movie but that might be because I read the book before watching it. Still, I believe that even if I hadn’t read the book I still wouldn’t have liked the movie.
Way too many details have been altered and condensed in order to make the story slightly more palatable.
I don’t want to sound like a book snob but the book is definitely better.
On a scale of 1 tamale to 10 tamales I give Miss Peregrine’s Home for Peculiar Children 6 tamales! ūüėé

Don’t Breathe Movie Review¬†

Rocky (Jane Levy), Alex and Money are three Detroit thieves who get their kicks by breaking into the houses of wealthy people. Money gets word about a blind veteran who won a major cash settlement following the death of his only child. Figuring he’s an easy target, the trio invades the man’s secluded home in an abandoned neighborhood. Finding themselves trapped inside, the young intruders must fight for their lives after making a shocking discovery about their supposedly helpless victim.
This isn’t your typical gory horror movie. It’s actually more of a psychological thriller with horror overtones… and I like that.
I mean, I’ve grown tired of the horror genre over the years. Most horror movies tend to be copycat versions of each other but every once in a while one of them will try something a little different that helps set them apart from the rest. Don’t Breathe does just that.
The entire cast gives pretty decent performances and the ending isn’t too surprising but it does leave the story open to a possible sequel.
On a scale of 1 tamale to 10 tamales I give Don’t Breathe 8 tasty tamales! ūüėé

Morgan Movie Review 

Morgan (Anya Taylor-Joy) is a bioengineered child who began walking and talking after one month of existence, exceeding the wildest expectations of her creators. When Morgan attacks one of her handlers, a corporate troubleshooter (Kate Mara) visits the remote, top-secret facility where she’s kept to assess the risks of keeping her alive. When the girl breaks free and starts running amok, the staff members find themselves in a dangerous lockdown with an unpredictable and violent synthetic human.
For the most part… this movie is an intriguing scifi thriller. Unfortunately, the bulk of the action occurs much too soon and seems somewhat forced. 
Kate Mara gives the most interesting performance but probably because her character has the biggest secret.
If you like intriguing scifi movies that aren’t bogged down by too many details then I recommend watching Morgan. 
On a scale of 1 tamale to 10 tamales I give it 7 tamales! ūüėé

Logan Movie Review 

*This is a spoiler free review.*
In the near future, a weary Logan cares for an ailing Professor X in a hide out on the Mexican border. But Logan’s attempts to hide from the world and his legacy are up-ended when a young mutant arrives, being pursued by dark forces.
Logan definitely exceeded my expectations! 
I must admit… I didn’t care too much for the previous Wolverine movies. Sure, they were decent action packed comic book adaptations but they were also severely limited by their PG-13 rating(s). 
I believe Logan’s R rating allowed the story to remain true to its animalistic roots.
Hugh Jackman gives one of his best, if not the best, performances of his career. Patrick Stewart reaches new depths as Professor X and Dafne Keen is superb as X-23.
If you’re a fan of the Wolverine and/or X-Men movie franchise then I highly recommend watching Logan!
On a scale of 1 tamale to 10 tamales I give it 10 delicious tamales! ūüėé
*I’ll be posting a spoiler filled review at a later date.*

Into The Forest Movie Review 

In the wilds of the Pacific Northwest, two sisters (Ellen Page, Evan Rachel Wood) must fight for survival after an apocalyptic blackout leaves them without gas, water, electricity or cellphones.
This movie could technically be categorized as a post-apocalyptic thriller but it’s really about the strong bond between two sisters who are forced to quickly become self reliant.
Most of the problems they face are man-made and harsh but they ultimately persevere and survive what could only be described as the dawning of a new age for all mankind.
Ellen Page and Evan Rachel Wood give superb performances. The story is also pretty well written. There are some minor plot holes but they don’t detract from the overall theme of the movie.
If you like watching movies that tug at your heart strings and are set in lush green environments then I recommend watching Into The Forest.
On a scale of 1 tamale to 10 tamales I give it 8 delicious tamales! ūüėé

Ratter Movie Review 

‚ÄčRatter stars Ashley Benson as Emma, a graduate student living on her own in New York City for the first time. Little does she know that a hacker has gained access to all of her technological devices and proceeds to stalk her every move.
He watches her as she cooks, eats, dances, sleeps, and bathes. Eventually, he tires of just watching her from afar and starts physically stalking her. Why? Who knows why? No clearly defined reason is ever divulged.
The majority of the movie consists of video footage recorded from the hacker’s point of view. In other words, video recorded via Emma’s laptop, tablet, and smartphone. I liked this aspect of the movie because it makes the viewer feel as though they are watching actual events unfold.
Unfortunately, the story does fall a bit flat and most of the characters seem way too one dimensional. Ashley Benson gives a decent performance but even her hotness isn’t enough to add any depth to an otherwise stagnant story.
If you’re into movies with a voyeuristic edge then you’ll no doubt enjoy Ratter.
On a scale of 1 tamale to 10 tamales I give it 7 tamales! ūüėé

Horns Movie Review 

‚ÄčIn the aftermath of his girlfriend’s mysterious death, a young man awakens to find strange horns sprouting from his temples.
Horns is a pretty bizarre, weird, crazy, wacked out movie! And that’s what makes it so awesome!
Ig Perrish (Daniel Radcliffe) is wrongly accused of murdering his girlfriend. Just about everyone in his hometown treats him like an infectious monster. Then, as if things couldn’t get anymore complicated, two devil-like horns begin to grow out of his forehead.
The story is very well written! Though, it’s not surprising since it was adapted from a novel of the same title. Daniel Radcliffe also gives a pretty great performance. He’s definitely come a long way since his Harry Potter days.
If you like weird and awesomely unique movies then I highly recommend watching Horns!
On a scale of 1 tamale to 10 I give it 9 tamales! ūüėé

Hardcore Henry Movie Review 

‚ÄčHardcore Henry is definitely one of the best action movies I’ve ever seen! That may sound like an over exaggeration but I swear it’s not.
Henry is brought back from the dead as a half human half robot hybrid by a woman claiming to be his wife. Before she can activate his voice function, armed thugs storm in and kidnap her. Henry then spends the rest of the movie battling scores upon scores of bad guys and inevitably faces off against a very powerful bad guy known only as Akan.
The action and special effects are pretty much nonstop. What I liked most was the first person perspective throughout the movie. It really made me feel like I was playing an action packed video game! I hope more action movies are made in the same vein. It seems to be a very overlooked and underappreciated style of cinematography.
There are also some very unexpected plot twists. The final fight scene alone is worthy of as much praise as the entire movie.
If you like action movies that keep you on your toes and make you feel like you’re the main character then I highly recommend watching Hardcore Henry!
On a scale of 1 tamale to 10 tamales I give it 9 tamales! ūüėé

Crimson Peak Movie Review 

‚ÄčAfter marrying the charming and seductive Sir Thomas Sharpe, young Edith (Mia Wasikowska) finds herself swept away to his remote gothic mansion in the English hills. Also living there is Lady Lucille, Thomas’ alluring sister and protector of her family’s dark secrets. Able to communicate with the dead, Edith tries to decipher the mystery behind the ghostly visions that haunt her new home. As she comes closer to the truth, Edith may learn that true monsters are made of flesh and blood.
This movie surprised me. I thought it was going to be yet another mediocre horror movie but there’s actually more to the story.
Yes, there are plenty of ghoulish scenes but they are actually quite important to the development of the main character, Edith. Mia Wasikowska definitely gives a strong performance throughout the movie. As does the entire cast.
The cinematography also adds a lot of texture and color to each scene. It gives the movie a very gothic yet industrial look.
There are also some shocking plot twists that really round out the story nicely.
If you’re interested in watching a horror movie with some depth to it than I highly recommend watching Crimson Peak.
On a scale of 1 tamale to 10 tamales I give it 8 tamales! ūüėé