American Ultra Movie Review

American Ultra is like Jason Bourne meets Cheech and Chong. Well… almost but not quite.

Mike (Jesse Eisenberg) is your typical laid back stoner living a simple life with his stoner girlfriend, Phoebe (Kristen Stewart), in a small town.

Then, one day, a strange woman walks into the mini-mart that he works at and utters a bunch of random words to him then leaves. A few minutes later, he notices some guys messing with his car in the parking lot. As soon as he approaches them they become hostile. Luckily, Mike is able to defend himself using nothing more than a spoon.

He eventually finds out that he is in fact a CIA sleeper agent who was once part of a top secret program that involved reprogamming the minds of certain individuals and turning them into covert fighting machines.

Jesse Eisenberg gives a pretty convincing performance. It’s obvious that he worked really hard at perfecting all of the choreographed stunts. He probably did a lot of stoner research too.

I give American Ultra 7 out of 10 tamales! ūüėé

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Batman v Superman Movie Review

*Warning! This review contains spoilers!*

I’ve already seen Batman v Superman : Dawn of Justice twice and I gotta’ admit… It is insanely awesome! It’s got practically everything a DC Comics fan like me could ever ask for!

Yes, it is a mix of different storylines and some details have been changed but it is still worthy of standing on its own as a solid DC movie.

One of the biggest complaints some of the so called “critics” have against it is the fact that it’s unrealistic. Duh! Of course it’s unrealistic! It’s a freakin’ super hero movie! Everyone knows there’s no such person as Superman or Batman!

Before I get into some details I want to point out… Henry Cavill rocks as Superman! Ben Affleck rocks as Batman! Gal Gadot rocks as Wonder Woman and Jesse Eisenberg rocks as Lex Luthor Jr.!

That’s right, the Lex Luthor in this movie is the original Lex Luthor’s son! So, technically he’s allowed to act as crazy or psychotic as he wants to… and he is quite the loon.

The most intense Lex Luthor scene is when he shows Superman some Polaroids of his tied and gagged mother, Martha Kent. He then says she will die in an hour unless he kills Batman. Lex actually appears to derive some kind of sick satisfaction from this.

Right from the get go Superman does not want to kill Batman, let alone fight him. So, the actual battle between the two caped men is relatively short. Batman gets in some good hits with the aid of a suit of armor, Kryptonite smoke bombs and a Kryptonite tipped spear. Of course, it’s also easy to tell that Superman really held back. He even makes a point of telling Batman that if he wanted him dead he would’ve done it already.

Eventually, Superman manages to choke out that Lex Luthor is holding his mother captive. It turns out that Bruce Wayne’s mother was also named Martha. This then causes him to flashback to a memory of his long deceased mother, Martha Wayne. The fight then comes to an abrupt end. Superman goes after Lex Luthor and Batman goes to rescue Martha Kent.

In my opinion, the best battle is the intense faceoff against Doomsday. That also happens to be the first official introduction of Wonder Woman. Her Amazonian strength helps give Batman and Superman a fighting chance. For those unfamiliar with Wonder Woman’s origins it may look as though she appears out of nowhere. (This will be rectified in a stand alone Wonder Woman movie due out in theaters June 23, 2017.)

There are also some short yet gratifying cameos made by Aquaman, Flash, Green Lantern and Cyborg. That fulfills the Dawn of Justice part of the movie.
And for those of you who don’t know… there will eventually be a Justice League movie after each member gets their own stand alone movie.

I won’t spoil the ending. It is very tragic but trust me when I say it’s not a final ending. It’s only the beginning!

If you are a DC Comics fan you’ll enjoy this movie. If you’re not into super hero movies or are more of a Marvel fan… It’s safe to say you won’t enjoy it.

I give Batman v Superman : Dawn of Justice 10 out of 10 tamales! In fact… I’ll even throw in an extra  tamale. That’s right… I believe it is worthy of my first 11 tamale rating! ūüėé

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Selfless Movie Review

Ben Kingsley and Ryan Reynolds are lovers who move into their first town house together then try to adopt a baby from Korea who…. wait a minute… wrong movie.

Ben Kingsley plays a billionaire who is diagnosed with cancer and seeks out information about an experimental procedure known as Shedding. The gist of it is that they can transfer anybody’s consciousness from one body to another. Thus, allowing anyone with the right amount of money to become somewhat immortal.

So, Ben Kingsley’s consciousness is then transferred into the body of Ryan Reynolds. Ryan Reynolds then goes on to star as Deadpool in… sorry, wrong movie again.

Anyway, it turns out that the previous inhabitant of Ryan Reynolds’ body was thoroughly trained to be a killing machine by some covert branch of the military. So, I guess it’s kind of like watching a super young Ben Kingsley kick some serious ass.

There’s an interesting plot twist towards the end. I shall describe it for you….. just kidding! I won’t ruin the ending but you really should watch it.

On a scale of 1 tamale to 10 tamales I give Selfless a tasty 8 tamales! Mmmm tamales! ūüėé

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